Hetalia Christmas Crashes AlfredxReader

"Hey, you gonna eat that burger?" He asks you while stuffing his face with his... what, how many has it been? Six? Eight? No wait, his tenth burger.
"No Al, of course not, why would I ever buy a burger with my own money and eat it? Would you care to take this off my hand?" You answer him with the utmost use of sarcasm.
His face perks up with the brightest smile you've ever seen on him.
"Really? Thanks" And with that, he leaned over and took a huge bite out of the burger you were holding. You jerked your hand away from the fatass, causing him to loose his footing and smash his face into the counter next to you two.
"OW! Thmat hurmt!!"
You began to laugh uncontrollably as he used his freehand without a burger to rub his face.
"That's what you deserve! How many burgers did you eat already?! You said we were here to buy Christmas decorations for the party!"
"We are!! We're just in here for a snack!!"
"It's been half an hour and you ate over ten burgers!! You're scaring the employees!"
When he had smashed his face onto the counter, he spilled french fries everywhere on the floor and table. The french fries flew every where and one just happened to fly into your hair.
"Hahaha! _____, you really make me want to eat you!"
"What?" You halt from your laughing to question what he means, cause the last time you checked, he only ate burgers.
He leans over and tries to grab the french fry with his mouth. You swat his face away and took the french fry for yourself. You smile  while munching triumphantly on your french fry.
"Aw! No fair! That's my french fry!"
You swallowed the french fry dramaticly. "Was, Alfred. Was."
Then you reached up to pat his head as if he was a little kid throwing a fit, which he kind of was for buying the happy meals.
"Geez, and I was supposed to be the Hero."
"In your burger-munching-high-cholesterol-American-dreams."
He decided to counter back with a tackle.
"CHARGE!"
It was about then when the lady at the cash register started yelling at the two of you on top of each other on the floor with burgers, wrappers, and french fries scattered everywhere.
"FLIRT SOMEWHERE ELSE!"
And thus you two were kicked out of the McDonalds in the corner of Walmart with a blushes on forming on your faces.

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After picking yourselves up and dusting off of what was left of your dignities, you two decided to walk into the store as if nothing ever happened.
The store was decorated with the holiday colors; red, green, and white.
Decorations were hung everywhere along with the store's usual logo.
Kids were jumping around at the toys section, much like Alfred was actually, and parents ran around looking for gifts.
"_____! _____! Can we pleaaaaasee go look at the toys section real quick?"
He had the sappiest puppy dog look on his face and to say no to him would be like kicking the dog out and feed it a rotten hamburger.
"Fine..."
"Yippee!!!~"
And thus, you were lead around the toy section with Alfred for another half hour till he finally calmed down and bought Christmas decorations with you.

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I swear, the people at the checkout lines were practically scared out of their minds when Alfred was next with his giant load of Christmas decorations.
I wouldn't blame them, he had so much in his hand that a regular person would need a forklift to carry it.
How he was able to lift all that was bewilderment to your own eyes. Luckily one of the braver workers gave you two a cart to roll all of that stuff out of the store.

In the parking lot, Alfred was having trouble locating his truck. He was sure that it was around the first or second lane... or third... or fourth.
You sighed as he jumped around looking for his truck. It was jam packed with people in the store and the parking lot was no less different.
"Alfred, can't we just walk home?"
"Dude, I had four more burgers in the glove department! I can't just let them get cold in there!"
You rolled your eyes and pushed the heavy cart-load of Christmas stuff behind him.
Just then, Alfred finds something that took his attention away from searching for his truck.
"_____! Look at me!"
You looked up and almost dropped your jaw as you saw Alfred riding a shopping cart as a skateboard dangerously around a very expensive looking car.
Your face paled when he feigned a wipe out and nearly crashed into the car.
"A-Alfred, slowly, move away from the car..." you mutter.
"Psh, I got this!" He yells out while doing a handstand on the cart which was still rolling around in the dark dimly lit parking lot.
"ALFRED LOOK OUT!!!" You scream to the oblivious American.
"Huh?" He turns to face in front of himself. "Ah crap..." He mutters as his cart generously crashes into some truck.
Meh, least he found his truck.
You quickly rush over to the truck where he had fallen, leaving the cart full of Christmas decorations unattended.
"Oh dude, what happened?" you ask, kneeling over the crazy American.
"Mow my nwose..." He slaps his hand over his face in pain.
You look him over and saw that there were no extreme injuries on him and decided that he was okay.
"You hurt anywhere?" You ask him.
"IT HURTS LIKE HELL." He states with a blank face.
You shook your head and decided to give him an early Christmas present.
While he was still mumbling about his aching head, you bent over and kissed him lightly on the nose.
His face remained still.
"_____... I WAS SUPPOSED TO THAT!!"
"Eh?" You step back in confusion.
"DUDE, I HAD IT ALL PLANNED OUT TODAY! I WAS SUPPOSED TO DO THAT AT THE END!!"
He continues to rant on about his awesome heroic plan of some-sort with a blush on his face.
You shook your head once again and kissed him fully on the lips.
'This'll shut him up' you thought.
Alfred decided to forget about everything and kissed you back.
Halfway through the kiss, he pulled away abruptly for some unknown reason.
"Huh? Why'd you stop Alfie?" You ask.
"What the FUDGE is that?"  he asks while pointing behind you.
You turn around to see something you never thought you'd see...
Behind you was a naked hobo. Presumably French due to the wavy blond hair and the random rose petals that trailed after him while he ran off with your cart of Christmas decorations.
"CATCH HIM!" Alfred yells.
"Au Revoir!~ Have fun with yourselves little lovers!" The French hobo began to run.
Alfred took action and ran off behind the hobo. You decided to join seeing how you won't get to return the stuff after Christmas, and that the security at Walmart were probably going to ask questions later anyway.
"COME BACK HERE YOU FRENCH HOBO!" Alfred's yells rang through the parking lot.
"OHONHONHON~! Merry Christmas lovebirds! Joyeux Noël!" The French hobo yells out right before being hit by a car.
The driver of said car rolls down his window and peeks his head out.
Alfred and you just had to take note of how bushy the driver's eyebrows were.
"Oh, I'm sorry I nearly hit your shopping cart. Please excuse my driving skills." Though you two could clearly see that the man had a smirk growing on his face. "You see, I'm not very used to driving over here, I just came from over the pond."
The French hobo wakes up and stumbles away quietly, leaving your cart full of Christmas decorations which Alfred quickly took over.
"I see that that fellow's alright, so-"
But then he was cut off by the sound of sirens.
"Oh bollocks. Merry Christmas and don't speak of this again. See ya."
The driver quickly rolls up his window and drives off skillfully dodging cars in the traffic and people in the streets on his getaway.
"What the FUDGE?" Alfred repeats.
"Meh." you mutter, walking with Alfred twords his truck.